One female jiu jitsu player recently shared her experience on Planet BJJ, about how a man refused to roll with her because the man’s wife “wouldn’t let him” roll with a female….
I legitimately do not understand this mentality- which admittedly even though I was in a relationship with a fellow grappler/jiu jitsuka/whatever, I’m also involved in the sport so I’m coming at this from a totally different perspective. I was never jealous of him rolling with another female because I knew how I behaved with other guys, and understood what happened in class and on the mats.
I would really like to sit down with one (or a couple) of these women and try to understand their concerns which leads them to push this edict on their partners. Is it lack of communication? An expectation as to how each grappler will react while rolling with one another (how a girl will react to the guy, and vice versa)? I’m genuinely curious as to where the issue lies precisely: I typically believe that once we understand the cause of an issue, we can work on resolving it, or at least coming to some sort of compromise.
Have you encountered this as a woman, a guy refusing to roll with you due to the request of a partner, and more importantly, did they explain why? Dudes, have you been with a girlfriend/partner that didn’t like the idea of you rolling with a female, and did you two talk about what was causing the issue? Let me know!