We all lose at one point or another in a tournament match: there are few BJJ players, if any, especially at a higher rank who can claim they have never lost a match. And I will admit, it can be crushing sometimes: you train day and night, put in hours upon hours of drilling, and even with all that hard work, someone else’s hand is raised at the end of the match. Maybe from a submission, possibly from a ref’s decision.
It happens, and yes, it’s absolutely important to learn from your mistakes, but not to obsess over them. If you videotape your matches, watch them, even ask your instructor or a high belt you trust what they thought went wrong if you are not sure…Just don’t sit alone in your underwear, clutching a glass of bourbon in the dark as you watch those mistakes over and over again. While an interesting mental image, it’s quite counter-productive. And creepy.
I’m just trying to look out for you, so you don’t re-enact this scene from Ace Ventura, Pet Detective (this is actually changed slightly for some recent football player, but you get my drift)