Daily Archives: August 30, 2010

What We Can Do vs. What We Think We Can Do

My 100th post! YAY! And to mark this special occasion, I will actually plan something out to write, and not just 1/2 ass it! Woo! And since this whole blog is about being a lady, this post will primarily be about being a woman mainly in terms of society, but there is some jiu jitsu thrown in there: here we go!

There is a certain stigma that women can only do so much: that since we are smaller we are weaker, more fragile, and not having much “muchness”, to quote Johnny Depp’s Mad Hatter. There are those, men and women who both root for the women’s movement, but still have the idea that women really cannot do all the same things that men can do, or at least be in close comparison. Some think this unconsciously, while there are others that believe ¬†this crazy idea and while not saying it outright, act out such thoughts through their words, choices and actions. And they should be endowed with a big old mushroom print.

For anyone that knows me, I am not some half-crazed feminist that is standing over my computer with The Feminine Mystique in one hand and bra ready to burn in the other. I’m a girl. I like to feel good in our out-about-town clothes, put up my hair in some kind of fashionable way, and have been known to slap on a little lipstick now and again. My main beef with these people is that in a subversive way they are telling girls what they cannot do eventually becomes so ingrained in their souls that they start to believe this shit and end up limiting themselves, more often than not subconsciously and out of habit more than anything else.

Again, these things are never said outright by those around us, and luckily we have gotten to a point in our society that we are now telling girls they can be anything they want intellectually. Physically..we need to seriously work on this image. There is a sick sense of what a woman is supposed to look like in the media today, and how they are supposed to maintain a healthy weight. Not only that, there is a set of limitations that we set upon ourselves, for no other fact that we are women. ¬†Obstacles were meant to be overcome, and that’s what makes us the people we are today.

How about this: start telling women they can do shit. Sure, we may not be able to do some of those physical activities just as well as some men, but we’ll do them a hell of a lot better than others.

Take jiu jitsu, for example. Women in jiu jitsu are known for having a very technical, tight, fast, beautiful game on the mat. It’s not the same game as a 250 lb., 6’4″ man who also steps on the mat, but they both have their good qualities, just not in the same areas. We may not be able to pull off a fireman’s carry, but the sweeps and execution of techniques that women are able to do have a level of speed and grace that a larger man would never be able to pull off.

I guess I am writing about this for a couple of different reasons: I hate when fellow women think they can’t do things when really they can. I used to be one of those girls. I was mired in self-doubt and lack of confidence, and through jiu jitsu and being around the supportive network of friends and teammates I have over the past year or so begun the process of stripping away the things I believed I could not accomplish.

…Like, you know…writing about stuff….on the big ole’ World Wide Web.

I think we could take over the world if we could just get past what we think we can do, and do something we thought never possible.

And if you ready all the way through this post, well congratulations! You get a cookie!


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